Caring for a person wtih dementia
Those close to them should try to do what they can to help the person maintain their feelings of self-worth and a sense of identity.
It is important to treat the person with dementia with respect. It might be useful to try to understand what the person is experiencing and why they behave in certain ways.
Things you can do to help:
- Be flexible and tolerant
- Take the time to listen
- Talk regularly
- Do things together
- Show affection in a manner in which you both feel comfortable
Courtesy
However advanced the dementia, it is important to treat people with dementia with courtesy. If you were in their position imagine how you would like to be spoken to. Listen to them even if they do not seem to making a great deal of sense. Look for meaning in what they say as whatever the detail of what they are saying, the person may be trying to communicate how they feel. Also avoid criticising or scolding and never talk about them as if they are not there. Include them in conversations. And most of all, be reassuring and kind to the person you are caring for without talking down to them.
Respect
Addressing a person with dementia in a way that the person prefers and recognises is important. Some may prefer younger people, or those who do not know them very well to address them formally, using titles such as Mr or Mrs. Others may be happy for anybody to call them by their first name.
Respect and Cultural Values
Respecting the person’s religious or cultural beliefs is also imperative. Make sure you explain the person's cultural or religious background, and any rules and customs, to anyone from a different background so that they can behave accordingly.
You should make yourself aware of the following:
- Forms of address
- Food they can eat
- Ways of dressing the hair
- How the person washes
- How the person uses the toilet
- Ways of undressing
- Religious festivals
- Prayers
- Any forms of touch or gestures that are seen as disrespectful
- Particular clothing or jewellery that the person or those around them should or should not wear
Respect and Privacy
Try to ensure the person’s right to privacy is respected. Always knock on the person's bedroom door before entering. If the individual requires assistance with activities, such as washing or using the toilet, handle this sensitively and make sure the door is kept closed if other people are in the vicinity.
Maintaining Respect
When a task is too great often it can appear daunting. Try to avoid situations in which the person is bound to fail, as this can be humiliating. Try to give them tasks that they can manage and activities they enjoy and encourage them. You could try breaking down tasks into small steps to encourage a sense of achievement. You could also carry out the task alongside the person to help them retain some independence rather than do a task for them. Encourage the person to take pride in their appearance and compliment how they look.
Help the person feel good about themselves
It is important to take into account the abilities, interests and preferences of the person for whom you are caring. These may alter as dementia progresses, so try to be flexible in your approach and respond sensitively. Dementia affects people’s thinking, memory and reasoning, however the person’s feelings remain intact, therefore try to support the person in a way that they can express their feelings. A person with dementia may be sad or upset at times.
Be an emotional support for the person as they may want to talk about their anxieties and the problems they are experiencing. Try to understand how the person feels and make real time to offer them support. Furthermore, do not dismiss their anxieties or worries, listen to them and show that you are there for them.
Choice
People with dementia, wherever possible, deserve to be informed and consulted about matters which concern them. They also deserve the opportunity to make their own choices. Explain what you are doing and why you are doing it. Read the expression and the body language of the person as you may be able to gauge their reaction. At times people with dementia can find choice confusing, therefore keep things simple. Consider phrasing questions that require short responses, such as ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
Other things to remember
Provide other carers involved in caring for the person with as much background information as possible. Although some symptoms of dementia are common, it is important to remember that dementia affects people differently. Each person with dementia is an individual, with individual needs and feelings. If the person with dementia behaves in a way that some find annoying, it is important to be aware that this could be due to the dementia, so be patient.
