Pam Morton OBE Eulogy

"To explain, I am the Chief Executive of the National body that co-ordinates the League of Friends.  The older I get, the more conscious I become that we all see people through the lens which we know them.  Today I want to pay tribute to Pam as a woman leader in the voluntary sector.

"I first met Pam some 20 plus years ago.  She had been involved in the periphery of our organisation in activities, but had been busy moving to Kentmere Drive.  Her role with us was to become an important part of her life,  and she always described herself as the “luckiest woman” to have this unexpected chapter beginning in her mid-seventies.

"Lord Fraser of Carmyllie, with who she had a great friendship describes the women leaders of the League of Friends as “formidable women with a deep-rooted love of their community.”  I well remember the AGM where he shared this reflection.  I held my breath, not sure how the assembled company would respond.  There was a moments silence, then a general murmuring, and nodding of heads. He had hit the nail on the head, and that description (in my view) was appropriate for Pam.

"However, I want to initially focus on some of Pam’s other character traits which really contributed to her success.

"For context at the National body, she really didn’t “seek greatness, but had it thrust upon her.”  From early involvement as Chairman for Yorkshire in 2003, to becoming Deputy Chair in 2006, she learned her craft.  We went through a difficult period (it’s not unusual in charities), and she temporarily stepped up as Chair,  and then took on the role until December 2010.  During those few years she travelled the length and breadth of the country from Inverness to Truro, from Bury St Edmunds to Bridgend, South Wales.  There was never a month where she wasn’t on the road, rallying the troops.  They take some rallying.

"So the first trait I want to touch on is her interest in people.  She was always interested in everyone from the staff and volunteers onwards.  In quiet moments she would sit in an armchair in the corner of my office knitting and staff would pop in and out.  She learned all their stories and secrets.  The staff called her “Chairmum”, and she remains the only Chair to have received a Mothering Sunday card signed by all the staff group.  Equally, she got to properly know local groups and their leaders well. It was a mark of their relationship when the groups in North Wales arranged a trip to the area where she had been evacuated to during the war.  They wanted to honour her and their friendship.

"Part of this was due to her sense of humour, another important trait.  The first time I met her; the senior regional representatives were together near Euston. When lunch was announced, everyone needed to move to an adjacent room. The crowd streamed out, and I was left to lock up.  Pam alone, was meticulously applying lipstick.  As a man, I couldn’t quite see the point, wasn’t she about to eat and drink?  Wouldn’t it come off?  So, I enquired, with a cheeky grin “was she trying to catch someone’s eye.”  Her response was “at my age, you have to be ever vigilant for the opportunity.”   That unexpected and witty style of responding, became the hallmark of her time with us, and it was definitely designed to raise a smile, and even a belly laugh.  It made her unforgettable.

"Her personality meant that she could mix with, and chat to everyone, whoever they were.  Her love of all things “established”, meant she was always delighted when her role took her within the orbit of the Royals.  The Duke of York was our Patron, and that meant private audiences at Buckingham Palace. His offices were all at the front overlooking the monument to Queen Victoria.

"On one occasion, there was a throaty motorbike group going round and round.  He was distracted and looked out of the window, you could see the rising irritation.  As he turned back, he asked Pam what she thought?  Her response was “it’s like Helmsley on a Saturday.”  He looked slightly perplexed, then laughed out loud.  The tension was broken.  A useful trait.

"The other trait I want to comment on was Pam recognised her own limitations, and when she needed help, asked for it, and welcomed it.  She was at her best when part of a team.  My role might be to lend an arm, as we bought up a “magnificent rear” (her words not mine), or to draft a speech.  She was always grateful, gave credit and a pleasure to help.

"I want to go back to “being a formidable woman, with a deep-rooted love of the community.”

"As part of her role Pam received two significant honours.  The first she described as “for her efforts.”  It was the Order of Mercy, an old Victorian Order, presented originally for services to hospitals, and given in very grand surroundings in the Egyptian Room, at Mansion House.

"The second was her OBE for services to volunteering.  She never tired of explaining the difference between an MBE and an OBE. MBE: “my bloody effort,” OBE: “other buggers effort.”  She never failed to mention it was because of her role as the Chair of a national charity that she received it, and that it was a recognition of every single volunteer, in every single League of Friends. Their efforts.

"Formidable, meant standing up for values she believed in but also doing things that aren’t easy.  There was one occasion when we were in north-west England.  I was on the platform, and one of the chaps in the audience, who was well known for having an anti-London agenda was treating me like a “coconut on a shy.”   When he had fired his volleys, Pam stood up and thumped her stick on the floor and proclaimed, “I will not have my Chief Executive spoken to like that” to the gathered company, the room was instantly silent.  No further negative comments, and a private apology from his Chair.  She could be formidable.

"In closing. Pams natural curiosity, and compassion meant that she was interested in so many communities.  At Attend, she introduced two new communities to our fairly eccentric and eclectic family, she loved them both.

"In 2009, we were advised that the London Brain Injury Centre was closing. Within 24 hours, Pam was on a train into London and had visited the service. Within a week, it was relocated to our offices, where it still remains.  We have an average 175 new beneficiaries join the service, every year and have worked with over 2500 brain injury survivors since she got us involved.

"Then by 2015, Pam had retired, and was a Vice President.  We were considering a new service to encourage the community to better support care homes. Amarna House just round the corner from here today was one of our first locations, and she was one of the first regular volunteers.  She remained President of that local group right up until her death.

"So, from her mid 70’s right through to her mid 90’s Pam was passionate and engaged with her wider community, working hard to improve the lives of others.

"However, we were always very aware that she was ‘on loan’ to us.  Never a conversation was had, where those she loved were not mentioned.

"Mary and Michael, Graeme, David, Tamsin and Ren, Jack and  Orna, Jo, Wendy, Aurene.  Her cousins Mary-Anne, Janet, Kirsty, her cat Maisie and the list could go on and on.  She cared about you all, was aware of individual achievements and both proud of, and shared in successes.  She really was a force of nature, and we too feel her loss deeply.

"As an organisation we have been proud of our association with Pam.  One of the phrases that I was struck by recently was “you finally die when the last living person mentions you.”  On that basis Pam will live for many, many decades.  There are stories like the one of her trousers falling down in this Church, or phrases like “crimes of Paris,”  “snackette,” and “ever is vigilant for the opportunity” have become embedded in Attend’s culture’ and are being repeated by young people who have volunteered with us, and are now all around the world.  I am quite convinced as a formidable woman with a deep-rooted love of communities, she will outlive us all.  She has inspired many, and that is a legacy which will endure for decades.

"On behalf of the 400 Leagues of Friends across the country, and the 25,000 active volunteers,  we miss you Pam Morton, and we will remember you."

To listen to Pam talking about her experience with the Friends of York hospital, click here.